Stop Imprisoning Yourself
Every single time you tell yourself a version of no, you are limiting your potential. You are essentially locking yourself in a box and throwing away the key.
If that happens to you too often, here's how to make a spare key:
Stop believing the no. Refuse to be controlled by a simple one-syllable word. Especially when it's not even your no.
Now, this no can come in different versions. Sometimes you'll hear it as "I could never do that" and sometimes you'll hear it as "I'm not that ____" or "I'll never reach my goal." These are all lies you tell yourself because your brain is there to protect you. Your brain doesn't want you to feel those negative emotions that come from failure or rejection or humiliation. If there is even a chance of that, your brain will try to talk you out of it. The trick is, you only have five seconds to act before your brain sends the hounds to destroy any shred of belief that you are capable. That's five seconds to change the course of your life. Five seconds to unlock your true potential. Don't let five seconds define you.
The next time you have an idea or something inspires you to do something, just do it. Don't think, don't wonder, don't plan, just do. If you see that guy or girl in the grocery store and you want to ask for their number, don't wait, just do it. If you are afraid to call up a friend you haven't talked to in ages, don't think about how it could go wrong, just do it. It might end up being the exact thing that your friend needed at that time. Don't stop yourself from knowing what could have been and don't be selfish by stopping others from knowing you.
When an idea to act pops in your head. You need to count to 3. (Not 5 because you’ll cut it close) At the end of those three seconds, you need to act. If you don't, your brain will act for you. Is your brain a part of you? Yes. Is it there to protect you? Yes. Can you be too overly protected? Yes. That's why we have the heart. The heart is there to keep the brain in check. The heart is there to give you reasons to live when your brain fills you with reasons to not. Your heart is there to follow your passions and your dreams. It's there to love others and to love yourself.
The brain is great for computations and logic and telling you when you're full or in pain. It'll warn you not to touch that hot stove and not to get into that white van with tinted windows. It's great for those kinds of dangers, but sometimes the brain can put danger where there is none. Sometimes we fear things that have yet to happen or may never happen. I know, for me at least, I worry so much about things that will never happen or situations that may never come to fruition. I'm learning that positivity is the mindset that wins all battles. Now, I consider myself a positive person, but that doesn't mean I encounter every situation expecting a positive outcome. In fact, the older you get, the harder it is to expect things will work out. It's an active choice to look at the world and your life that way. I am making that choice now.
Instead of telling myself no, or a variation of it, I'm going to go in to every challenge and situation with the mindset that I've already won, that I've already crushed it, that everything I need is going to come to me one way or another. I will only hear the yes from now on because I know my life will change drastically because of it. It will change for the better. I don't want to be misunderstood here when I say things will work out. Some of you will read that and think well that's just delusional or even think I expect things to happen without doing anything at all. I'm not saying everything will come to me in a passive way, nor am I saying that everything I want will be mine. My mindset is that I will have to put in the work, but everything I need will come in time because of that work. Wants and needs are two different things.
I may want 50 red velvet cupcakes, but what I need is to be healthy. Sometimes your wants and needs will not line up perfectly. Other times, they will. I've found that the more you love yourself, the more those two align. So, if I work hard for my needs, they will come, but the only way they will come is if I refuse to give in to "no."
Every time I say "No, you don't have enough energy to exercise tonight," I stop myself from working towards a healthier me. Every time I say "I'm too shy to talk to that person," I stop myself from working towards new connections and new possibilities in life. Every single time I say "I'll never reach my goal," I stop myself from living out my true potential and giving myself that purpose and fulfillment I need.
So, to close this out, I challenge you to say no to no. Stop listening to no aka excuses. Those excuses have no function other than to stop you from growing. I’ve said it many times and I’ll never stop saying it, if you’re not growing you’re not living and if you’re not living, you’re dying. Stop killing yourself and start loving yourself enough to grow beyond who you are today. Who
You are today doesn’t have to be your destination point. You have so much more to do. Don’t say no to that future. Say yes to owning your life and start being responsible for where you end up. It’s not easy by any means but it’s worth it.
Don’t blame things on what you can control. You will regret not having tried. And regret is the toughest teacher in life but the only difference between learning from failure VS regret is that after failure you can start again and adjust. Regret is a point of no return. Don’t be a prisoner of regret. It’s a horrible cage. Make that spare key while you can.
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